Has it been that long since I've cooked? Well, no. Has it been that long since I cooked a decent meal? Has it been that long since I've had a night where I didn't cook so badly that I end up curled in bed crying over spilt...well, spilt and burnt everything? Um, yes. (Chew on that sentence, English major!)
Where is my kitchen mojo? Work has been crazy lately, plus I've started working out again after work (that's a lot of the word "work," not sure how I feel about this development once I see it in writing), so that really cuts into the amount of time I have in the evenings to whip up something spectacular (or at least edible).
Last night I made quesadillas again (AN EXCUSE FOR SALSA) and I was in such a rush to get the supplies at the grocery store (was supposed to be at the post office, err) that I picked up GIGANTIC TORTILLAS MADE FOR GIANTS. Have you ever tried to flip over a gigantic tortilla made for giants? Basically, we had like...I don't know, quesadilla salad? In a bowl? To be eaten with a fork? Perhaps a SOFT SHELLED CHICKEN TACO SALAD? Whatever, there was salsa on it. I ate while I CRIED (not recommended - way too much salt) in the office, and Will ate at the table while watching a Martin Lawrence movie.
1. I didn't want to watch my sweet husband gallantly eat the tasty but hideous meal I fixed. I was that depressed about ripped tortillas. I actually SAID "I am going in the office. I have no desire to watch you eat that. I'm that depressed."
2. I REALLY didn't want to watch a Martin Lawrence movie while I sobbed around a mouthful of sloppy quesadillas. Awkward.
Also, I get my period in a couple of days!
But I will tell you, real quick like, what I put on my quesadillas (whether they work out or not, the same thing goes on them):
CHICKEN QUESADILLAS or KRISTA'S UNFORTUNATE CHICKEN SOFT TACO SALAD OF PAIN AND REGRET
chicken, in tiny pieces.
lettuce (yes, in the tortillas, yes, it will go in a hot pan later)
SALSA (and if your salsa is OUR SALSA, don't use cilantro on your quesadillas, pls)
sharp cheddar cheese, shredded some much smaller quesadillas than those that were previously mentioned. (woodland fairy quesadillas, if you will.)
Like you couldn't figure that out. I use olive oil spray to cook them (the six boxes of butter in my fridge is for baking, not for everyday consumption). You know what? Fuck this, I know you know how to make quesadillas. I mean, I have no idea why you couldn't wrap your brain around homemade sloppy joes, but I FEEL DOWN IN MY TOES that you don't need me to tell you how to not fuck up some Mexican food. It's that whole "I can feel that Kendra hates tuna" vibe going on.
Let's see, what else have I cooked in these past weeks that I have not blogged about. OOOOOOH, one Saturday I made dinner and brought it over to mom's house - beef tips and gravy, cornbread muffins, glazed carrots, and Jack Daniels apples. That was a really good night, a really good meal. Do you have the glazed carrots or Jack Daniels apples recipes? If not, let me know. They are awesome. I did make your breakfast quiche one Saturday morning. That was amazing. Oh and I redid the shrimp pasta with regular tomatoes. I thought it was a lot better, Will was still kind of on the fence about it.
THIS WEEKEND I should finally be able to get my veggie plants in the ground, SO. I'm excited about that, bringing all that good stuff into the kitchen. Mostly the tomatoes and jalapenos, but I'm sure you can't imagine why.
Hey, is cilantro hard to grow?
Showing posts with label oops. Show all posts
Showing posts with label oops. Show all posts
Easy Boneless Pork Chop With An Amazing Flavour.
So, last night was kind of a bust. Which wholeheartedly sucks because I finally got a chance to cook and it wasn’t even worth half the effort I put forth (not too much).
Let me just throw this out there: the internet is a scary place. I bet you already knew that. The internet is especially scary for a naïve and innocent girl who just wants to find a yummy way to cook pork chops. Seriously. (that is not to say this recipe is bad – it’s not entirely…what went wrong was something I bet I could easily fix. I just am in awe of how many recipes I trip across that sound HORRIBLE. Or how many I’ve tried that have gotten rave reviews that taste like something I dug out between Battlecat’s back teeth. Not that I’ve ever eaten anything from my cat’s teeth. Jesus!)
I found a recipe on a site full of user-submitted recipes and I have to admit I chose it because a. it didn’t involve making a gravy and I did NOT want to make rice last night and b. it had the Best Title Ever.
It was called “Easy Boneless Pork Chop With an Amazing Flavour.”
With the period on the end! And just the one chop!
So, without further ado, Easy Boneless Pork Chop With an Amazing Flavour:
EASY BONELESS PORK CHOP WITH AN AMAZING FLAVOUR.
4 boneless pork chop(s) (HAHA)
3 tbsp applesauce
¼ cup butter (This recipe was written by someone from England, and the original recipe called for 100 g of butter, so I just read the comments and did what those fools said.)
1 tsp sage
1 tsp rosemary
1 garlic clove, minced
2 tbsp olive oil
1 apple, chopped (I used a Braeburn, because it was all I had left)
salt and pepper
(In my own words, because the original recipe kind of rambled on and on about “flavours.”)
Mix butter, apple sauce, and oil together. (I melted my butter…not all the way, actually, because this needs to be kind of stiff) Add rosemary, sage and garlic. Season with salt and pepper. If it’s not stiff enough to coat the meat (ew?), add more butter.
Score the pork chops with lines on both sides. Place each chop on it’s own piece of foil, just enough to tightly wrap. Smear the coating on both sides of meat, massaging it in generously. (EW!)
Wrap the foil tightly around the chops and put in the oven on 350 for 30 minutes.
Remove from the oven and unwrap just enough to fit apple wedges on top of each chop. Wrap that shit back up.
It says to cook it for 30 more minutes but to check it often to make sure it’s not overcooked or dry.
Here’s the problem with this – it’s SWIMMING in juice, so you can’t tell it’s overcooked or too dry. Mine was.
It smelled AWESOME as it was cooking, even Will commented on it. When we got down to eating it – not so much. It just tasted like a bland, overcooked pork chop. Obviously, the overcooked part was my problem. This morning I talked to Squirrel about it (we both talk about food a loootttt) and he said you pretty much have to marinate pork overnight for it to soak up any flavor. SO, I will definitely give this one more chance, but I will marinate it to see if that helps.
Also, next time, I will leave the rosemary off of Will’s pork chops. I always forget that he HATES rosemary. I make fun of him and just tell him to brush the grass off, but it kind of sucks when someone who loves you a whole lot can’t remember what you hate hate hate and you have to pick your food apart. I’m sorry to my husband, who has very definite tastes, if not at all varied or interesting.
So what did we have with these pork chops? Well, parsley potatoes, which you don’t need a recipe for (but, hey, how do you cook yours? Mine are never as good as mom’s!) and green beans.
Oh, green beans.
I love green beans. Well, no, that’s not entirely true. I love green beans in their fresh, unadulterated form. I love them just a little bit crunchy with just some olive oil and salt or hey! some lightly toasted sesame seeds. Mmmm.
I live with a man who wants them canned with bacon and a stick of butter and an entire salt mine thrown in for good measure. Actually, no, I live with a man who has NO IDEA how he wants them, just “not like that” and I know what he means, but I am not going to spend 30 minutes chopping up raw bacon to appease his steadily widening ass. NO NO NO. (sorry for the rant there!) I just don’t believe green beans need bacon and canned soup and fried onions and what other abominations people come up with to serve at family get-togethers. (that is not to say I don’t eat those things with delight – but on a run-of-the-mill Thursday night?)
Especially this time of year when I’ve got veggies ready to go in the ground for the first time ever and all I can think about is FRESH! And SIMPLE! And WHOLESOME!
So I just steamed my green beans for a bit until they were just tender and then I sautéed them with a little butter and garlic and I seasoned them with a little ground pepper and kosher salt.
Ok, too much butter. And not fresh garlic, just minced garlic from a jar and too much of it, at that. I was in a hurry, ok?
So green beans? Not very good. My fault. Not wholesome or fresh or any of the above. Just garlicy and slick with butter and sad. Wasted potential.
I just felt like last night could have been a lot better. It gets me down, you know?
BUT! We went grocery shopping last night for and I got all the stuff for some planned meals (do you plan four or five meals in advance so you know what to buy/what’s in your house that needs to be used?). Hopefully not too far in the future, I can post about your breakfast quiche (hoping to try that tomorrow…can I make it ahead and keep it in the fridge overnight?), my beef tips (oh dear), a creamy shrimp and pasta DO OVER! (with plain tomatoes, maybe served cold?) and a spinach, provolone and sausage pizza.
Speaking of that pizza, I got the recipe from a blog friend so I’m a little more trusting than just pulling it from the deep blue sea. However, it calls for 2 links of Italian sausage. And then it goes on to tell you to break up the sausage while you’re browning it, which leads me to believe it’s ground? In the grocery store yesterday I wasn’t sure where to look. Meat department? Deli? Do you know? I feel like an idiot.
Let me just throw this out there: the internet is a scary place. I bet you already knew that. The internet is especially scary for a naïve and innocent girl who just wants to find a yummy way to cook pork chops. Seriously. (that is not to say this recipe is bad – it’s not entirely…what went wrong was something I bet I could easily fix. I just am in awe of how many recipes I trip across that sound HORRIBLE. Or how many I’ve tried that have gotten rave reviews that taste like something I dug out between Battlecat’s back teeth. Not that I’ve ever eaten anything from my cat’s teeth. Jesus!)
I found a recipe on a site full of user-submitted recipes and I have to admit I chose it because a. it didn’t involve making a gravy and I did NOT want to make rice last night and b. it had the Best Title Ever.
It was called “Easy Boneless Pork Chop With an Amazing Flavour.”
With the period on the end! And just the one chop!
So, without further ado, Easy Boneless Pork Chop With an Amazing Flavour:
EASY BONELESS PORK CHOP WITH AN AMAZING FLAVOUR.
4 boneless pork chop(s) (HAHA)
3 tbsp applesauce
¼ cup butter (This recipe was written by someone from England, and the original recipe called for 100 g of butter, so I just read the comments and did what those fools said.)
1 tsp sage
1 tsp rosemary
1 garlic clove, minced
2 tbsp olive oil
1 apple, chopped (I used a Braeburn, because it was all I had left)
salt and pepper
(In my own words, because the original recipe kind of rambled on and on about “flavours.”)
Mix butter, apple sauce, and oil together. (I melted my butter…not all the way, actually, because this needs to be kind of stiff) Add rosemary, sage and garlic. Season with salt and pepper. If it’s not stiff enough to coat the meat (ew?), add more butter.
Score the pork chops with lines on both sides. Place each chop on it’s own piece of foil, just enough to tightly wrap. Smear the coating on both sides of meat, massaging it in generously. (EW!)
Wrap the foil tightly around the chops and put in the oven on 350 for 30 minutes.
Remove from the oven and unwrap just enough to fit apple wedges on top of each chop. Wrap that shit back up.
It says to cook it for 30 more minutes but to check it often to make sure it’s not overcooked or dry.
Here’s the problem with this – it’s SWIMMING in juice, so you can’t tell it’s overcooked or too dry. Mine was.
It smelled AWESOME as it was cooking, even Will commented on it. When we got down to eating it – not so much. It just tasted like a bland, overcooked pork chop. Obviously, the overcooked part was my problem. This morning I talked to Squirrel about it (we both talk about food a loootttt) and he said you pretty much have to marinate pork overnight for it to soak up any flavor. SO, I will definitely give this one more chance, but I will marinate it to see if that helps.
Also, next time, I will leave the rosemary off of Will’s pork chops. I always forget that he HATES rosemary. I make fun of him and just tell him to brush the grass off, but it kind of sucks when someone who loves you a whole lot can’t remember what you hate hate hate and you have to pick your food apart. I’m sorry to my husband, who has very definite tastes, if not at all varied or interesting.
So what did we have with these pork chops? Well, parsley potatoes, which you don’t need a recipe for (but, hey, how do you cook yours? Mine are never as good as mom’s!) and green beans.
Oh, green beans.
I love green beans. Well, no, that’s not entirely true. I love green beans in their fresh, unadulterated form. I love them just a little bit crunchy with just some olive oil and salt or hey! some lightly toasted sesame seeds. Mmmm.
I live with a man who wants them canned with bacon and a stick of butter and an entire salt mine thrown in for good measure. Actually, no, I live with a man who has NO IDEA how he wants them, just “not like that” and I know what he means, but I am not going to spend 30 minutes chopping up raw bacon to appease his steadily widening ass. NO NO NO. (sorry for the rant there!) I just don’t believe green beans need bacon and canned soup and fried onions and what other abominations people come up with to serve at family get-togethers. (that is not to say I don’t eat those things with delight – but on a run-of-the-mill Thursday night?)
Especially this time of year when I’ve got veggies ready to go in the ground for the first time ever and all I can think about is FRESH! And SIMPLE! And WHOLESOME!
So I just steamed my green beans for a bit until they were just tender and then I sautéed them with a little butter and garlic and I seasoned them with a little ground pepper and kosher salt.
Ok, too much butter. And not fresh garlic, just minced garlic from a jar and too much of it, at that. I was in a hurry, ok?
So green beans? Not very good. My fault. Not wholesome or fresh or any of the above. Just garlicy and slick with butter and sad. Wasted potential.
I just felt like last night could have been a lot better. It gets me down, you know?
BUT! We went grocery shopping last night for and I got all the stuff for some planned meals (do you plan four or five meals in advance so you know what to buy/what’s in your house that needs to be used?). Hopefully not too far in the future, I can post about your breakfast quiche (hoping to try that tomorrow…can I make it ahead and keep it in the fridge overnight?), my beef tips (oh dear), a creamy shrimp and pasta DO OVER! (with plain tomatoes, maybe served cold?) and a spinach, provolone and sausage pizza.
Speaking of that pizza, I got the recipe from a blog friend so I’m a little more trusting than just pulling it from the deep blue sea. However, it calls for 2 links of Italian sausage. And then it goes on to tell you to break up the sausage while you’re browning it, which leads me to believe it’s ground? In the grocery store yesterday I wasn’t sure where to look. Meat department? Deli? Do you know? I feel like an idiot.
Low Sodium 4Eva
Last night's quesadillas and black bean soup would have been PERFECT, had everything not been over-salted all to hell. Usually I buy the low-sodium taco seasoning in the little packets...Old El Paso brand, I think. Well, they were out of low sodium last time I stocked up, so I bought a few packets of regular, just to be done with my grocery list. Yeah. No. I think I've finally found the motivation I need to come up with my own taco seasoning mix. Do you buy or make your own? I've seen a few recipes online to make your own, and you can control the amount of salt that goes into it (and the amount of everything else! YAY CONTROL!) I've also seen recipes for making your own cajun seasoning (like Tony's) but, again, with the ability to control the salt content. HMM.
The soup was my own damn fault. There is no salt in the recipe, but I know I always have to add a pinch. I added more than a pinch. I forgot I was only cooking a HALF pot, and I added enough salt for a whole, and...well...I half-ass fixed it by adding more beans and broth, and throwing a couple of potato chunks in there to try to soak up the salt. Meh. I guess for that trick to work, it has to cook longer than I had time for. I was in a HURRY, because I always am.
Anyway, it wasn't bad! Everyone ate and was happy with it, I just know it was too salty, and today I FEEL GROSS. I think I'm retaining water...
Tonight, I'll bake some quick fish sticks (you can bake some quick chick stacks! OH MY POOR BRAIN) and tater tots while I prep the beef tips for the slow cooker the next day. Seeing a pattern here? One night of sticking a frozen meal in the oven while I prep for a home-cooked meal the next night. And so on. Repeat for the next several decades.
PS. I checked my tome for green bean recipes for you, but unfortunately all I have in there right now is sesame green beans, green bean casserole, and a couple recipes that involve adding a half ton of bacon. Probably not what you're looking for!
The soup was my own damn fault. There is no salt in the recipe, but I know I always have to add a pinch. I added more than a pinch. I forgot I was only cooking a HALF pot, and I added enough salt for a whole, and...well...I half-ass fixed it by adding more beans and broth, and throwing a couple of potato chunks in there to try to soak up the salt. Meh. I guess for that trick to work, it has to cook longer than I had time for. I was in a HURRY, because I always am.
Anyway, it wasn't bad! Everyone ate and was happy with it, I just know it was too salty, and today I FEEL GROSS. I think I'm retaining water...
Tonight, I'll bake some quick fish sticks (you can bake some quick chick stacks! OH MY POOR BRAIN) and tater tots while I prep the beef tips for the slow cooker the next day. Seeing a pattern here? One night of sticking a frozen meal in the oven while I prep for a home-cooked meal the next night. And so on. Repeat for the next several decades.
PS. I checked my tome for green bean recipes for you, but unfortunately all I have in there right now is sesame green beans, green bean casserole, and a couple recipes that involve adding a half ton of bacon. Probably not what you're looking for!
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