I miss cooking complicated things.
I have two hours after I get home to cook dinner, feed us all, get William bathed and settled down and in bed. That leaves zero time for me to actually sit down and enjoy my family unless we go out to eat and someone makes the food for us, or we just feed William and don't eat ourselves until after he's in bed (and that leaves us feeling icky).
I know it will get better, I know! I'm just anxious for it do that already - but then I'm not, because it will be so bittersweet to have a boy who doesn't want me to hold him every single second, who won't be at my feet, crawling between my legs, pulling out all of the pots and pans.
Tonight we're having pancakes, because they're easy and fast and we all like them. I'll probably end up making a strawberry syrup because I have some strawberries that need to be used and because I'm never happy unless I've made SOMETHING difficult-ish.
How are you, sister-cousin? I miss you all the time!
Mom Pride
Oh hey, while I'm here, I'd like to take a moment to give big props to red beans and rice - the first fully home-cooked meal that Curtis has ever requested of me.
He came home one day and asked me to make "some beans that we had at school today." After figuring out what kind of beans he meant, I explained to him that I'd have to make them on the weekend, because they take a long time to cook.
This meal is now referred to at our house as "The Beans That Take A Long Time To Cook," and Curt can clean two or three plates of them as long as I DO NOT MIX THE RICE AND BEANS. He must observe the plating, to ensure the rice is laid down first, then the beans are lovingly spooned on top. No sausage.
MY KID.
He came home one day and asked me to make "some beans that we had at school today." After figuring out what kind of beans he meant, I explained to him that I'd have to make them on the weekend, because they take a long time to cook.
This meal is now referred to at our house as "The Beans That Take A Long Time To Cook," and Curt can clean two or three plates of them as long as I DO NOT MIX THE RICE AND BEANS. He must observe the plating, to ensure the rice is laid down first, then the beans are lovingly spooned on top. No sausage.
MY KID.
Lemonade
From the person who brought you chili in summer, here is lemonade in December!
I made some this weekend (someone gave me a giant bag of gorgeous lemons, and I nearly kissed that person), and Curtis LOVES it. I have traded cup after cup for his everlasting devotion. Good trade. I highly recommend this as emotional currency.
Here, I'll just link the recipe: http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/perfect_lemonade/
It's not that hard, I just would not have thought to do it this way, because I'm not very smart. But this is how (I now know) Grandma Rhea made her lemonade. Every summer. And she'd serve it to us from that little metal pitcher and it would be very cold. And sometimes she'd drop a few maraschino cherries in to make pink lemonade. And we would serve it to our Barbies with little cut-up Kudos bars. And I still miss her every day.
Hang on, I got something in my eye...
Bonus points for defining and illustrating the word "dissolve" to a preschooler while you watch the sugar disappear as the water heats up. Science is delicious!
I made some this weekend (someone gave me a giant bag of gorgeous lemons, and I nearly kissed that person), and Curtis LOVES it. I have traded cup after cup for his everlasting devotion. Good trade. I highly recommend this as emotional currency.
Here, I'll just link the recipe: http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/perfect_lemonade/
It's not that hard, I just would not have thought to do it this way, because I'm not very smart. But this is how (I now know) Grandma Rhea made her lemonade. Every summer. And she'd serve it to us from that little metal pitcher and it would be very cold. And sometimes she'd drop a few maraschino cherries in to make pink lemonade. And we would serve it to our Barbies with little cut-up Kudos bars. And I still miss her every day.
Hang on, I got something in my eye...
Bonus points for defining and illustrating the word "dissolve" to a preschooler while you watch the sugar disappear as the water heats up. Science is delicious!
The Perfect Baked Potato
I'm going to get right down to it. Are you ready? Okay, here's how you make the perfect baked potato.
You get some nice fat russet potatoes or whatever. Only the good ones - no green spots or sprouts or anything like that. Now, scrub them well in COLD water, and pat them dry, dry with a dish cloth. Look all around the potato for spots and eyes and whatnot, and snip those bits out with a knife. Help the potato be its best.
Line a baking sheet with foil (or don't; I just always do), and preheat the oven to 425 degrees. HOT. Lay the clean and dry potatoes on the baking sheet, and drizzle them with olive oil. Roll them around in the oil and cover the whole potato evenly. It puts the lotion on its skin.
STAB THEM WITH A FORK. Three or four times on each side. Then sprinkle sea salt aaaalll over them. Roll the potatoes around in the salt to get even coverage.
When the oven is hot, stick 'em in. It depends on the size of your potatoes how long you leave them in there. Start with 30 minutes, then check them. Bigger potatoes may go 45 minutes, or even an hour.
Take the potatoes out ONLY when you can spear a fork all the way through the middle and it feels soft and fluffy inside all the way through. You will learn to understand this part.
Basically, you have just roasted a potato instead of steaming it in foil or another type of wrapping. And it is perfect. The skin is crisp and golden with just the right saltiness, and the inside is waiting for butter. The butter will melt into the potato and you will eat the potato.
My favorite thing to do with baked potatoes is to make a POTATO BAR. Like a salad bar or a taco bar, but with potato toppings. Duh. I like to put chili and cheese on one side of my potato, and sour cream, green onion, and bacon bits on the other side.
Do you like baked potatoes? How. Discuss your answer in the space provided below.
PS. THIS TAG
You get some nice fat russet potatoes or whatever. Only the good ones - no green spots or sprouts or anything like that. Now, scrub them well in COLD water, and pat them dry, dry with a dish cloth. Look all around the potato for spots and eyes and whatnot, and snip those bits out with a knife. Help the potato be its best.
Line a baking sheet with foil (or don't; I just always do), and preheat the oven to 425 degrees. HOT. Lay the clean and dry potatoes on the baking sheet, and drizzle them with olive oil. Roll them around in the oil and cover the whole potato evenly. It puts the lotion on its skin.
STAB THEM WITH A FORK. Three or four times on each side. Then sprinkle sea salt aaaalll over them. Roll the potatoes around in the salt to get even coverage.
When the oven is hot, stick 'em in. It depends on the size of your potatoes how long you leave them in there. Start with 30 minutes, then check them. Bigger potatoes may go 45 minutes, or even an hour.
Take the potatoes out ONLY when you can spear a fork all the way through the middle and it feels soft and fluffy inside all the way through. You will learn to understand this part.
Basically, you have just roasted a potato instead of steaming it in foil or another type of wrapping. And it is perfect. The skin is crisp and golden with just the right saltiness, and the inside is waiting for butter. The butter will melt into the potato and you will eat the potato.
My favorite thing to do with baked potatoes is to make a POTATO BAR. Like a salad bar or a taco bar, but with potato toppings. Duh. I like to put chili and cheese on one side of my potato, and sour cream, green onion, and bacon bits on the other side.
Do you like baked potatoes? How. Discuss your answer in the space provided below.
PS. THIS TAG
Favorite Pasta Salad
I haven't felt like turning on the oven, because it's SO HOT OUTSIDE that it's even hot inside. You know what I mean? Yeah, you know what I mean.
I am not a huge fan of pasta salad, or cold dishes in general, but this stuff is the best for all-purpose summer eating. I make a big bowl of it, stick it in the fridge, and it sits there getting better and better the longer it chills. I bring it to work for lunch, or serve it with chicken or fish for supper, or just snack on it whenever.
IT IS SO EASY. HERE IT IS:
Garden Rotini Pasta - the pretty colored spiral stuff. It boils up quickly (don't overcook it, it should be firm - 9-11 minutes tops), and you can turn the stove off afterwards. You are DONE with the stove. Give the pasta a good rinse in cool water and let it drain while you cut up veggies.
Tomatoes - cherry tomatoes are the best, but I've been using the big fresh tomatoes mom gave me from her garden. They're a little juicy for pasta salad, but I slice them, then pat the slices dry with a paper towel before dicing them. Keeps the mess out of the bowl.
Zucchini - one or two whole zucchini - leave it raw and don't bother peeling it. I slice mine down the center long-ways, then slice it into half-circles. Toss 'em in the bowl.
Black Olives - if you're into those. Slice 'em up, toss 'em in.
Parmesan - I like the shredded kind that comes in the little tubs in the cheese section of the store. I've been using that stuff on EVERYTHING lately.
Greek Vinaigrette Dressing - or Italian dressing, if you can't find Greek. I way prefer Greek, but I'm a picky dressing snob.
Salt and Pepper (and a Little Shake of Tony's)
MIX, STIR, SEASON TO TASTE, CHILL IN FRIDGE, EAT.
Oh. And sometimes I squeeze a lemon in there. Most times.
I am not a huge fan of pasta salad, or cold dishes in general, but this stuff is the best for all-purpose summer eating. I make a big bowl of it, stick it in the fridge, and it sits there getting better and better the longer it chills. I bring it to work for lunch, or serve it with chicken or fish for supper, or just snack on it whenever.
IT IS SO EASY. HERE IT IS:
Garden Rotini Pasta - the pretty colored spiral stuff. It boils up quickly (don't overcook it, it should be firm - 9-11 minutes tops), and you can turn the stove off afterwards. You are DONE with the stove. Give the pasta a good rinse in cool water and let it drain while you cut up veggies.
Tomatoes - cherry tomatoes are the best, but I've been using the big fresh tomatoes mom gave me from her garden. They're a little juicy for pasta salad, but I slice them, then pat the slices dry with a paper towel before dicing them. Keeps the mess out of the bowl.
Zucchini - one or two whole zucchini - leave it raw and don't bother peeling it. I slice mine down the center long-ways, then slice it into half-circles. Toss 'em in the bowl.
Black Olives - if you're into those. Slice 'em up, toss 'em in.
Parmesan - I like the shredded kind that comes in the little tubs in the cheese section of the store. I've been using that stuff on EVERYTHING lately.
Greek Vinaigrette Dressing - or Italian dressing, if you can't find Greek. I way prefer Greek, but I'm a picky dressing snob.
Salt and Pepper (and a Little Shake of Tony's)
MIX, STIR, SEASON TO TASTE, CHILL IN FRIDGE, EAT.
Oh. And sometimes I squeeze a lemon in there. Most times.
Blackened Chicken Caesar Salad
Summer on a college campus is wonderfully quiet and spacious, but the food sucks. After finals, most of the on-site restaurants close or offer limited menus, because thousands of hungry college kids are off bothering someone else for a couple months.
But what about my salads?? The coffee bar upstairs in the library sells salads at lunch during the semester. MY SALADS HAVE DISPPEARED for the summer and I'm kind of freaking out about that.
To the store! Get some:
* Chicken breast
* Parmesan cheese (the little tubs of shredded in the fridge section, not the canisters of grated in the pasta aisle)
* Big, fat croutons
* Caesar dressing
* A lemon
* Butter (or oil, if you just want to pan cook your chicken like normal. I'm BLACKENING it!)
* A bunch of seasonings -OR- one really good everything seasoning (like Tony's or Matt's)
* LETTUCE N STUFF
Laziness Disclaimer: I have a recipe for homemade croutons. I'm not doing that. They sell those in bags. Also, I'm sure there are 50,000 recipes online for fresh Caesar dressing made from local organic hand-picked Caesars, but I bought Kraft.
The main thing here is the chicken. You're gonna thaw out some chicken breast, and cut it up into chunks. You're gonna put those chunks in a bowl and squeeze a couple of lemon wedges all over them. Toss them around in that lemon juice. Mmm.
Now sprinkle them with seasoning. That Matt's stuff that Dad has is....it's...oh god it's amazing. Use that. If you don't have that, improvise with whatever you have in your pantry that would make a good all-purpose seasoning mix. You definitely want some black pepper, cayenne pepper, and garlic powder in that mix. Sprinkle lovingly on chicken and toss it all around.
Melt some butter - melt some in a little cup or bowl in the microwave (set that aside), then heat up a skillet to medium-high and melt another big, fat pat of butter in there. When the skillet is nice and hot, turn on your stove vent (!) and throw some chicken down. It's gonna sizzle and steam. Let it sit there and sear/blacken for a bit on one side, then - before you flip it over - drizzle a little fresh butter (from the bowl you set aside) over the topside, and hit it with another shake of seasoning. FLIP.
Drain your chicken - which should be a nice brown color on the outside with maybe a few little crusty black bits, and juicy-juicy on the inside! - pat it down with paper towels, whatever makes you feel better about using butter. Slice it into strips or cut it into cubes.
Toss your favorite greens (I went romaine, shredded iceburg, baby spinach) with fresh parmesan. Top with chicken chunks and croutons. Drizzle with Caesar dressing. I threw a few little grape tomatoes in with mine.
[Some kind of ending pun here, like "Hail Caesar!" or something, but less lame.]
Chicken Pot Pie...Biscuit...Casserole...Thing
This is in my recipe collection as "Chicken Pot Pie," but it's not actually a CHICKEN POT PIE. It's a variation thereof. A cheap, casseroled-out, biscuity-topped variation. Not a pie at all. It's...well, here:
CHICKEN POT PIE, KIND OF
1 lb chicken (whatever kind, I use skinless breasts because I don't care)
1 medium onion, chopped
2 stalks celery, chopped
1 can chicken broth
1/2 cup milk
1 can cream of mushroom soup (if you also don't care, otherwise you can substitute for this!)
Roughly 3/4 cup whatever fresh, canned or frozen vegetables you want to get rid of:
Carrots!
Peas!
Green beans!
Butter beans/lima beans!
CORN!
Bisquick mix (or your favorite brand of all-purpose baking mix) and milk to mix it with. OR you know. Your favorite homemade biscuit recipe, but - and I can't overstate this enough right now - I don't care.
To start, throw all the veggies in a pot of water and simmer them for like 20-30 minutes until they're cooked and tender. This recipe is excellent for getting rid of the last few vegetables in the bag, or cans that are about to expire. I add a pat of butter in with mine because...butter tastes good.
While the vegetables cook, chop the chicken into little chunks. Season to taste. Heat oil in a pan and brown them up. Pretty standard stuff. Remove the chicken and set it aside. I just go ahead at this point and put it in the bottom of a casserole dish.
Add the onion and celery to the empty chicken pan, and cook until the onion is translucent. Stir it all around from the bottom to get the flavor of the chicken bits left in the pan!
Next - cream of mushroom soup. Chicken broth. Milk. I don't have exact amounts for you, I'm so sorry. Start with 1/2 can of the broth, and 1/2 cup of milk, and work your way from there. Use your SKILL and PERCEPTION to decide if it's thick enough. If it's not, add a couple pinches of flour. Maybe you have too much chicken and veggies and not enough of this weird gravy to cover it all in the casserole dish? That happened to me! Add another can of mushroom soup, or more broth. You can cook, you got this.
If you don't want to use the soup, you can remove the onion/celery, make a quick flour/butter roux in the pan, and thicken it with the broth/milk mixture. That's up to you. The ultimate goal here is just to make a creamy chicken gravy to pour into the casserole dish. It does not have to be amazing.
POUR IT OVER THE CHICKEN IN THE CASSEROLE PAN. Drain your veggies when they're done, and stir them into the mix as well. PARTY IN YOUR BAKEWARE.
In a separate bowl, make some Bisquick mix. (OR HAND-MAKE BISCUITS, but that's ridiculous for a Thursday night. Community is about to start.)
My recipe literally says that. "Make some Bisquick mix." Well...okay? I used the "Biscuits or dumplings" recipe on the side of the box - I think it's 2/3 cup milk + 2 1/4 cups Bisquick mix. I did that TWICE because my casserole ended up being ENORMOUS. Fine. Did I mention I really don't care?
If you feel fancy, add a little sage to the biscuit mix for a nice subtle flavor. The sage in my pantry expired in 2010, did you know that?
You're going to top this casserole drop-biscuit style. Just plop 'em on there. They make a neat sound!
Preheat oven to 375. Stick this vat of food in there and cook it until the biscuit dough isn't raw and gross anymore. Like, I don't know, 30-40 minutes or so.
Eat it. Bring leftovers to work. Eat it again the next night. Bring more leftovers to work. I'm not kidding, I made WAY too much of this stuff.
It tastes great, though. And I totally DO care about that.
CHICKEN POT PIE, KIND OF
1 lb chicken (whatever kind, I use skinless breasts because I don't care)
1 medium onion, chopped
2 stalks celery, chopped
1 can chicken broth
1/2 cup milk
1 can cream of mushroom soup (if you also don't care, otherwise you can substitute for this!)
Roughly 3/4 cup whatever fresh, canned or frozen vegetables you want to get rid of:
Carrots!
Peas!
Green beans!
Butter beans/lima beans!
CORN!
Bisquick mix (or your favorite brand of all-purpose baking mix) and milk to mix it with. OR you know. Your favorite homemade biscuit recipe, but - and I can't overstate this enough right now - I don't care.
To start, throw all the veggies in a pot of water and simmer them for like 20-30 minutes until they're cooked and tender. This recipe is excellent for getting rid of the last few vegetables in the bag, or cans that are about to expire. I add a pat of butter in with mine because...butter tastes good.
While the vegetables cook, chop the chicken into little chunks. Season to taste. Heat oil in a pan and brown them up. Pretty standard stuff. Remove the chicken and set it aside. I just go ahead at this point and put it in the bottom of a casserole dish.
Add the onion and celery to the empty chicken pan, and cook until the onion is translucent. Stir it all around from the bottom to get the flavor of the chicken bits left in the pan!
Next - cream of mushroom soup. Chicken broth. Milk. I don't have exact amounts for you, I'm so sorry. Start with 1/2 can of the broth, and 1/2 cup of milk, and work your way from there. Use your SKILL and PERCEPTION to decide if it's thick enough. If it's not, add a couple pinches of flour. Maybe you have too much chicken and veggies and not enough of this weird gravy to cover it all in the casserole dish? That happened to me! Add another can of mushroom soup, or more broth. You can cook, you got this.
If you don't want to use the soup, you can remove the onion/celery, make a quick flour/butter roux in the pan, and thicken it with the broth/milk mixture. That's up to you. The ultimate goal here is just to make a creamy chicken gravy to pour into the casserole dish. It does not have to be amazing.
POUR IT OVER THE CHICKEN IN THE CASSEROLE PAN. Drain your veggies when they're done, and stir them into the mix as well. PARTY IN YOUR BAKEWARE.
In a separate bowl, make some Bisquick mix. (OR HAND-MAKE BISCUITS, but that's ridiculous for a Thursday night. Community is about to start.)
My recipe literally says that. "Make some Bisquick mix." Well...okay? I used the "Biscuits or dumplings" recipe on the side of the box - I think it's 2/3 cup milk + 2 1/4 cups Bisquick mix. I did that TWICE because my casserole ended up being ENORMOUS. Fine. Did I mention I really don't care?
If you feel fancy, add a little sage to the biscuit mix for a nice subtle flavor. The sage in my pantry expired in 2010, did you know that?
You're going to top this casserole drop-biscuit style. Just plop 'em on there. They make a neat sound!
Preheat oven to 375. Stick this vat of food in there and cook it until the biscuit dough isn't raw and gross anymore. Like, I don't know, 30-40 minutes or so.
Eat it. Bring leftovers to work. Eat it again the next night. Bring more leftovers to work. I'm not kidding, I made WAY too much of this stuff.
It tastes great, though. And I totally DO care about that.
Pistachio Cupcakes and Key Lime Pie
TOMORROW IS ST. PATRICK'S DAY! I love this holiday. I like it because I love to drink, and I love telling people my ancestors were Irish, and mostly I love to drink!
I can't drink this year, you know. I can eat, though, and I am almost as good at eating as I am drinking.
I decided I wanted to bake something for work today. Something green, but nothing dyed, because that's usually off-putting. I thought of things that are green and are also dessert-worthy. I remembered that spumoni cake I made for Easter a couple years ago and decided I would make pistachio cupcakes. I didn't want to just add a box of pudding or a handful of crushed nuts to a box mix, I wanted to make pistachio cupcakes, dammit. After searching for awhile on the internet, the same recipe came up over and over - a box of mix, a box of pistachio pudding, awful green food coloring. The cupcakes were bright shamrock green, the icing usually a pale minty color. They were awful. I was discouraged.
Then I came across this recipe from Feast on the Cheap and lo and behold! They used real pistachios! And flour! And sugar! And stuff! And no food coloring, so I decided to try it. I am really, really, really glad I did. It is hands down now my favorite cupcake I've ever made (well, no, any time I put candied orange peel on a cupcake is my favorite cupcake in the world). The only change I made was instead of buttercream icing I used cream cheese because I'm just not a huge fan of buttercream, no matter how many different recipes I try.
PISTACHIO CUPCAKES
1 c shelled unsalted pistachios
1 c all-purpose flour
2 tsps baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 c milk
1/2 tsp vanilla
1 stick unsalted butter, softened
3/4 c sugar
2 large eggs
1/2 c pistachios for decorating (is what I used)
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a muffin tin with paper liners.
Pulse the pistachios in a food processor until finely ground. In a large bowl, whisk together the ground pistachios, flour, baking powder and salt. Set aside.
Combine the milk and vanilla in a spouted measuring cup.
Beat the butter and sugar until fluffy and pale, about 2 minutes. Add the eggs one at a time until just combined. On low speed, alternately add the pistachio mixture and the milk in batches, starting and finishing with the flour. Finish mixing by hand and avoid over-beating.
Spoon the batter into the prepared muffin tin filling to the top of the liners. Bake for 12 - 14 minutes.
(The only thing I would change is they did not need to be filled to the top. I assumed maybe this instruction was because they didn't rise well, but they rise like any other cupcake I've ever made - definitely fill them 2/3 full like you would with any other cupcake batter. I had those big, flat, icky muffin-tops. Also because of that it only made 10...otherwise it would have certainly made a full dozen.)
Anyway, I lightly chopped up the 1/2 cup of pistachios, slapped on some of my cream cheese icing, and sprinkled with the nuts. Delicious! The guys up here really loved them, too!
On that recipe, she also linked to a key lime pie. You know what's special about a key lime pie? IT'S ALSO GREEN, SISTER.
I knew I was taking a chance pulling two recipes from one source and making them the same night, but I threw caution to the wind when I surfed for other pie recipes and realized they're all about the same!
KEY LIME PIE
For the crust:
1 1/2 c graham cracker crumbs
1/4 c sugar
1/2 tsp cinnamon
pinch of nutmeg
5 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
For the filling:
4 egg yolks
14 oz can sweetened, condensed milk
1/2 c key lime juice
And I had some whipped cream on hand for topping, but I didn't put it on top - I think next time I will since it would be prettier.
Cookie crumbs for decorating:
2/3 c graham cracker crumbs
2 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
2 tbsp sugar
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.
Prepare the crust. In a medium mixing bowl, whisk the graham cracker crumbs, sugar, and spices until blended. Stir in the melted butter, combining well.
Transfer the mixture to the bottom of a 9-inch pie plate. Lightly spread the crumbs evenly along the bottom and up the sides of the pie plate. Once evenly distributed, use gentle pressure to press the mixture into the bottom and sides, forming a rim slightly raised at the top edge of the dish.
If opting for the cookie crumble topping, prepare in the same manner, through step 2. Transfer the crumbs to a piece of heavy foil, folding up the sides to prevent spilling in the oven. (It looks like a flat-bottomed, square boat.)
Bake the pie shell and “boated” cookie crumbs for about 10 minutes until lightly browned.
Turn the oven temperature down to 350 degrees.
Meanwhile, prepare the filling. In a medium mixing bowl, using a whisk or electric mixer, lightly beat the eggs. Add the condensed milk, incorporating fully.
Gradually add the Key lime juice. Be careful not to over beat, if using an electric mixer, as the final product will form air bubbles on the surface.
Transfer the filling to the prepared pie crust. Using a rubber spatula, spread evenly to the edges of the crust.
Bake at 350 degrees for 10 minutes. The pie will jiggle – don’t worry as the final setting occurs in the fridge.
Allow to cool for 15 minutes and then refrigerate the pie for 8 hours.
Either spread the whipped cream over the top of the pie, or top each slice with a dollop. Sprinkle with the cookie crumbs.
That's it. I do have to admit that while the pie was baking I was cleaning up and noticed the cinnamon for the crust waiting patiently on the counter for me to add it in. Whoops! It didn't seem to make much of a difference to the guys who ate it.
So now I've got a new website I'm going to spend a lot of time browsing, and some ideas for Easter. Key lime pie? Another spumoni cake but this time with cream cheese icing (and maybe a lemon layer instead of a pineapple)? Or another Death by Chocolate trifle? (mmm) Any requests?
I can't drink this year, you know. I can eat, though, and I am almost as good at eating as I am drinking.
I decided I wanted to bake something for work today. Something green, but nothing dyed, because that's usually off-putting. I thought of things that are green and are also dessert-worthy. I remembered that spumoni cake I made for Easter a couple years ago and decided I would make pistachio cupcakes. I didn't want to just add a box of pudding or a handful of crushed nuts to a box mix, I wanted to make pistachio cupcakes, dammit. After searching for awhile on the internet, the same recipe came up over and over - a box of mix, a box of pistachio pudding, awful green food coloring. The cupcakes were bright shamrock green, the icing usually a pale minty color. They were awful. I was discouraged.
Then I came across this recipe from Feast on the Cheap and lo and behold! They used real pistachios! And flour! And sugar! And stuff! And no food coloring, so I decided to try it. I am really, really, really glad I did. It is hands down now my favorite cupcake I've ever made (well, no, any time I put candied orange peel on a cupcake is my favorite cupcake in the world). The only change I made was instead of buttercream icing I used cream cheese because I'm just not a huge fan of buttercream, no matter how many different recipes I try.
PISTACHIO CUPCAKES
1 c shelled unsalted pistachios
1 c all-purpose flour
2 tsps baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 c milk
1/2 tsp vanilla
1 stick unsalted butter, softened
3/4 c sugar
2 large eggs
1/2 c pistachios for decorating (is what I used)
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a muffin tin with paper liners.
Pulse the pistachios in a food processor until finely ground. In a large bowl, whisk together the ground pistachios, flour, baking powder and salt. Set aside.
Combine the milk and vanilla in a spouted measuring cup.
Beat the butter and sugar until fluffy and pale, about 2 minutes. Add the eggs one at a time until just combined. On low speed, alternately add the pistachio mixture and the milk in batches, starting and finishing with the flour. Finish mixing by hand and avoid over-beating.
Spoon the batter into the prepared muffin tin filling to the top of the liners. Bake for 12 - 14 minutes.
(The only thing I would change is they did not need to be filled to the top. I assumed maybe this instruction was because they didn't rise well, but they rise like any other cupcake I've ever made - definitely fill them 2/3 full like you would with any other cupcake batter. I had those big, flat, icky muffin-tops. Also because of that it only made 10...otherwise it would have certainly made a full dozen.)
Anyway, I lightly chopped up the 1/2 cup of pistachios, slapped on some of my cream cheese icing, and sprinkled with the nuts. Delicious! The guys up here really loved them, too!
On that recipe, she also linked to a key lime pie. You know what's special about a key lime pie? IT'S ALSO GREEN, SISTER.
I knew I was taking a chance pulling two recipes from one source and making them the same night, but I threw caution to the wind when I surfed for other pie recipes and realized they're all about the same!
KEY LIME PIE
For the crust:
1 1/2 c graham cracker crumbs
1/4 c sugar
1/2 tsp cinnamon
pinch of nutmeg
5 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
For the filling:
4 egg yolks
14 oz can sweetened, condensed milk
1/2 c key lime juice
And I had some whipped cream on hand for topping, but I didn't put it on top - I think next time I will since it would be prettier.
Cookie crumbs for decorating:
2/3 c graham cracker crumbs
2 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
2 tbsp sugar
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.
Prepare the crust. In a medium mixing bowl, whisk the graham cracker crumbs, sugar, and spices until blended. Stir in the melted butter, combining well.
Transfer the mixture to the bottom of a 9-inch pie plate. Lightly spread the crumbs evenly along the bottom and up the sides of the pie plate. Once evenly distributed, use gentle pressure to press the mixture into the bottom and sides, forming a rim slightly raised at the top edge of the dish.
If opting for the cookie crumble topping, prepare in the same manner, through step 2. Transfer the crumbs to a piece of heavy foil, folding up the sides to prevent spilling in the oven. (It looks like a flat-bottomed, square boat.)
Bake the pie shell and “boated” cookie crumbs for about 10 minutes until lightly browned.
Turn the oven temperature down to 350 degrees.
Meanwhile, prepare the filling. In a medium mixing bowl, using a whisk or electric mixer, lightly beat the eggs. Add the condensed milk, incorporating fully.
Gradually add the Key lime juice. Be careful not to over beat, if using an electric mixer, as the final product will form air bubbles on the surface.
Transfer the filling to the prepared pie crust. Using a rubber spatula, spread evenly to the edges of the crust.
Bake at 350 degrees for 10 minutes. The pie will jiggle – don’t worry as the final setting occurs in the fridge.
Allow to cool for 15 minutes and then refrigerate the pie for 8 hours.
Either spread the whipped cream over the top of the pie, or top each slice with a dollop. Sprinkle with the cookie crumbs.
That's it. I do have to admit that while the pie was baking I was cleaning up and noticed the cinnamon for the crust waiting patiently on the counter for me to add it in. Whoops! It didn't seem to make much of a difference to the guys who ate it.
So now I've got a new website I'm going to spend a lot of time browsing, and some ideas for Easter. Key lime pie? Another spumoni cake but this time with cream cheese icing (and maybe a lemon layer instead of a pineapple)? Or another Death by Chocolate trifle? (mmm) Any requests?
Hamburger Steaks (Bonus: Pronto Pups)
Mom gave me this recipe after I had it at her house one night. Dad kept talking about she would make it once a week when "the girls were little" but honestly I don't remember that. I think Dad's getting senile. Don't tell him I said that.
(Speaking of senile...we had this conversation over the phone a couple of weeks ago, didn't we? Crap.)
Anyway, this recipe is so hardcore Will-approved. He said, and I quote, "You finally served some MAN FOOD."
(The outcome of that exclamation is between Will and I only...but I did have to buy more band-aids the next day.)
Hamburger Steaks
Hamburger patties (hee, paddies. hee. heehee.)
Salt, pepper, Tony's
Oil for frying
Brown gravy mix (I used two envelopes - not crazy about Tony's mix)
1 onion, chopped
I AM KEEPING THE EXACT WORDS MOM WROTE ME:
Salt, pepper and Tony's on patties. Brown patties in a little oil. Drain and place in a casserole dish and cover with brown gravy. I just use a brown gravy mix. Don't sprinkle it dry...make it in a saucepan first :-) Sprinkle with chopped onions. Cover with foil and bake at 350 for about an hour.
DON'T SPRINKLE IT DRY, KRISTA. She knows me pretty well. She served hers over rice, mine was over mashed potatoes (I think I was trying to get the disposal fixed or the bird feeder filled or something). Both ways was delicious!
This was also in the email, but will be one of those things I'll let other people made - there is no way any "deep fat" is getting into my house.
(Also exactly how she wrote it):
Pronto Pups
1/2 cup meal
1 1/2 cup flour
1/4 cup sugar
2 tsps. salt
4 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup milk
1 egg beaten
Mix with beater and fry in deep fat.
If you venture down this path of Marksville fast food, save one for me! I like the mustard ones.
(Speaking of senile...we had this conversation over the phone a couple of weeks ago, didn't we? Crap.)
Anyway, this recipe is so hardcore Will-approved. He said, and I quote, "You finally served some MAN FOOD."
(The outcome of that exclamation is between Will and I only...but I did have to buy more band-aids the next day.)
Hamburger Steaks
Hamburger patties (hee, paddies. hee. heehee.)
Salt, pepper, Tony's
Oil for frying
Brown gravy mix (I used two envelopes - not crazy about Tony's mix)
1 onion, chopped
I AM KEEPING THE EXACT WORDS MOM WROTE ME:
Salt, pepper and Tony's on patties. Brown patties in a little oil. Drain and place in a casserole dish and cover with brown gravy. I just use a brown gravy mix. Don't sprinkle it dry...make it in a saucepan first :-) Sprinkle with chopped onions. Cover with foil and bake at 350 for about an hour.
DON'T SPRINKLE IT DRY, KRISTA. She knows me pretty well. She served hers over rice, mine was over mashed potatoes (I think I was trying to get the disposal fixed or the bird feeder filled or something). Both ways was delicious!
This was also in the email, but will be one of those things I'll let other people made - there is no way any "deep fat" is getting into my house.
(Also exactly how she wrote it):
Pronto Pups
1/2 cup meal
1 1/2 cup flour
1/4 cup sugar
2 tsps. salt
4 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup milk
1 egg beaten
Mix with beater and fry in deep fat.
If you venture down this path of Marksville fast food, save one for me! I like the mustard ones.
Creamy Jambalaya Pasta
Please disregard the drafts clogging up our dashboard. I'm trying to clean out my recipe basket and the bookmarks on all of my devices - laptop, home computer, work computer, and phone. It's a bit of a mess.
So a mutual high school friend of ours has recently posted some recipes of his on Facebook for his friends to try out. Out of the three he's posted so far, I chose the one that had ingredients I totally already had on hand because I'm not about to go out to the store and buy ginger root and red wine vinegar. (If I could get the money back for every bottle of different types of vinegar I have bought and then had to toss - I wouldn't be cooking, my ass would be sitting at the Red River Grill noshing on duck).
There are three things that I try very, very hard to steer clear of if friends recommend them: books, music, recipes. Books are the hardest, because I'm super picky and most of my friends have shit-tacular taste in books. Music is a bit easier, but still dodgy (file swapping over a six pack of Corona is okay, don't worry). I don't get offered a lot of recipes, but when I do, I ignore them.
(The exception to this rule is actually Jodi who not only has terrific taste in both books and music, but also hoo boy, can that girl cook! Don't tell her I ever paid her a compliment like that, though, okay?)
Anyway, I don't know what made me want to try this. I had the stuff? I was bored? I was already getting my weekly meal plan together? Whatever it was, I decided to throw him a bone and I'm kind of glad I did. I really, really liked this dish and it will probably make it in my rotation.
CREAMY JAMBALAYA PASTA
(it makes a lot)
1 lb curly pasta such as fusili
1 tbsp kosher salt
1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1 tsp freshly ground black pepper
l large red onion, finely diced, divided into 2 equal parts
1 large red bell pepper, finely diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 lb beef kielbasa link sausage or similar (I used turkey, duh)
2 cups heavy whipping cream
½ cup finely shredded Parmesan cheese
2 tbsp flat leaf Italian parsley, minced*
Prepare the pasta in a large pasta pot in salty water. The water should be salty like sea-water. (I did not test the water - ew) Drain and cover.
Meanwhile, in a large pot such as a Dutch oven heat the olive oil over medium/high heat. Sauté half of the onion, the bell pepper, garlic and sausage until tender, about 8 minutes. Reduce the heat to medium, add the cream and allow it to warm through, but not boil. Add in the pasta to the cream mixture and toss until well combined. Use the remaining red onion, parsley and Parmesan cheese to garnish as desired.
Easy and fast and delicious. Even Willy-pad liked it! I did add a hellacious amount of Tony's and a dash of Tabasco. You can't call something jambalaya and not have it a little spicy, I'm sorry. I will give our friend kudos on something that usually bugs the crap out of me about recipes - his measurements were all spot on. I was a couple ounces shy of a pound of pasta (I used rotini, if that matters to you) so I slimmed down the amount of onion I used, but it all turned out perfect.
(Also, I learned a NEW TRICK. I got this mini-food processor for free for being an old lady and collecting stamps from my grocery store, okay? And I used it to chop up the onion and bell pepper and even though you end up having to drain the juices the pieces end up SO SMALL that a husband cannot detect the vegetables! AH-HA! I GOT YOU, PATRICK BATEMAN!)
Also, I kept thinking how good this would be with shrimp instead of sausage. Or chicken and bacon. This would be so good with chicken and bacon, Kendra.
Pasta dishes are one of my favorites, because I think I like this tag best.
*Do you have herb scissors? Every time I use mine I think of you. I think you need a pair.
So a mutual high school friend of ours has recently posted some recipes of his on Facebook for his friends to try out. Out of the three he's posted so far, I chose the one that had ingredients I totally already had on hand because I'm not about to go out to the store and buy ginger root and red wine vinegar. (If I could get the money back for every bottle of different types of vinegar I have bought and then had to toss - I wouldn't be cooking, my ass would be sitting at the Red River Grill noshing on duck).
There are three things that I try very, very hard to steer clear of if friends recommend them: books, music, recipes. Books are the hardest, because I'm super picky and most of my friends have shit-tacular taste in books. Music is a bit easier, but still dodgy (file swapping over a six pack of Corona is okay, don't worry). I don't get offered a lot of recipes, but when I do, I ignore them.
(The exception to this rule is actually Jodi who not only has terrific taste in both books and music, but also hoo boy, can that girl cook! Don't tell her I ever paid her a compliment like that, though, okay?)
Anyway, I don't know what made me want to try this. I had the stuff? I was bored? I was already getting my weekly meal plan together? Whatever it was, I decided to throw him a bone and I'm kind of glad I did. I really, really liked this dish and it will probably make it in my rotation.
CREAMY JAMBALAYA PASTA
(it makes a lot)
1 lb curly pasta such as fusili
1 tbsp kosher salt
1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1 tsp freshly ground black pepper
l large red onion, finely diced, divided into 2 equal parts
1 large red bell pepper, finely diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 lb beef kielbasa link sausage or similar (I used turkey, duh)
2 cups heavy whipping cream
½ cup finely shredded Parmesan cheese
2 tbsp flat leaf Italian parsley, minced*
Prepare the pasta in a large pasta pot in salty water. The water should be salty like sea-water. (I did not test the water - ew) Drain and cover.
Meanwhile, in a large pot such as a Dutch oven heat the olive oil over medium/high heat. Sauté half of the onion, the bell pepper, garlic and sausage until tender, about 8 minutes. Reduce the heat to medium, add the cream and allow it to warm through, but not boil. Add in the pasta to the cream mixture and toss until well combined. Use the remaining red onion, parsley and Parmesan cheese to garnish as desired.
Easy and fast and delicious. Even Willy-pad liked it! I did add a hellacious amount of Tony's and a dash of Tabasco. You can't call something jambalaya and not have it a little spicy, I'm sorry. I will give our friend kudos on something that usually bugs the crap out of me about recipes - his measurements were all spot on. I was a couple ounces shy of a pound of pasta (I used rotini, if that matters to you) so I slimmed down the amount of onion I used, but it all turned out perfect.
(Also, I learned a NEW TRICK. I got this mini-food processor for free for being an old lady and collecting stamps from my grocery store, okay? And I used it to chop up the onion and bell pepper and even though you end up having to drain the juices the pieces end up SO SMALL that a husband cannot detect the vegetables! AH-HA! I GOT YOU, PATRICK BATEMAN!)
Also, I kept thinking how good this would be with shrimp instead of sausage. Or chicken and bacon. This would be so good with chicken and bacon, Kendra.
Pasta dishes are one of my favorites, because I think I like this tag best.
*Do you have herb scissors? Every time I use mine I think of you. I think you need a pair.
Stuffed Pistolettes
This is a rambling post about how I changed one of my favorite old recipes to make it happier. And it tastes good!
First, pistolettes. If you can't find a bread item called "pistolettes" where you are, just use some other big, fat yeast rolls with a sturdy crust. Anything hardy enough to hollow out and stuff will work just fine. (Ignore that that link describes them as "fried" - they are not bought fried. They are often fried as a method of cooking them, but we're not doing that.)
I prefer whole wheat pistolettes when I can find them, but the Winn Dixie by my house had a bag of 8 white pistolettes on sale for $0.99 the other day. EXCITING. I didn't want to spend any more than that on dinner, so I decided to substitute about half the old recipe with things I already had at home. Let's see how that went...
In the original recipe, you hollow out the rolls, stuff them with a meat/broccoli/cheese mixture, and bake them. We're still doing that, but we're changing the stuffing mixture. We're making it healthier and tastier.*
The original mixture for the stuffing goes like:
Ground beef
Broccoli
Velveeta
Cream of mushroom soup
Cooked white rice
Okay. The first thing we're doing is scrapping the rice. We've already got bread, which is plenty of starch. I image the rice was meant to make this meal stretch farther to feed more people cheaply? We're just a little family, though. And we're watching our carbs.
Next, cream of mushroom soup? I'm fresh out. But I do have a can of mushroom pieces and some milk. And some shredded sharp cheddar cheese instead of Velveeta...because. Just because. You know why.
I ALWAYS keep ground beef and broccoli florets in my freezer. Always have. Always will.
So here's what! Brown the ground beef. I like to flavor mine up with salt, pepper, Tony's, garlic and onion. It never hurts. Drain it.
You steamed some broccoli while you were doing that? Good. Chop it up small, small and throw it in with the beef. Also add in some (drained) canned mushrooms. Stir, stir. Drain it one more time if your veggies cook out a lot.
At this point, I dumped the meat and veggies into a big bowl and put the pan back on the heat. I threw in a little bit of butter (about 1.5 tbs) and melted it, then added the same amount in flour (about 1.5 tbs) to make a quick roux base for the cheese sauce. Stir the roux around until it's pasty, then slowly add in some milk. I don't know, like...1/2 cup? 3/4 cup? I was not measuring at this point. I was ROLLING WITH IT.
Stir and cook it like that until it starts to steam and thicken, then add in some cheese. Again - and you know you love me - I have no idea how much cheese. Maybe 1 cup. Maybe more. Just stir and taste, stir and taste. Season it, if you like! Salt and pepper. I'm sooo tired aaaalll of the time.
Once you don't hate your cheese sauce, dump in the meat and stir everything around. It needs to not be too soupy. It needs to be thick and cheesy and kind of...gluey. Add more cheese until it does that.
NOW you can hollow out your rolls, stuff them to bejesus, and brush the tops of the rolls with a little melted butter. Pop them in the oven (preheated to 400) for about 15-20 minutes. They will be crusty and buttery on the outside, and warm and gooey on the inside. They will fill you up and keep you that way.
THE END
* Note: this is not a healthy recipe, exactly, but I count removing the Velveeta as making it more healthy, so...whatever. DON'T YOU JUDGE ME.
First, pistolettes. If you can't find a bread item called "pistolettes" where you are, just use some other big, fat yeast rolls with a sturdy crust. Anything hardy enough to hollow out and stuff will work just fine. (Ignore that that link describes them as "fried" - they are not bought fried. They are often fried as a method of cooking them, but we're not doing that.)
I prefer whole wheat pistolettes when I can find them, but the Winn Dixie by my house had a bag of 8 white pistolettes on sale for $0.99 the other day. EXCITING. I didn't want to spend any more than that on dinner, so I decided to substitute about half the old recipe with things I already had at home. Let's see how that went...
In the original recipe, you hollow out the rolls, stuff them with a meat/broccoli/cheese mixture, and bake them. We're still doing that, but we're changing the stuffing mixture. We're making it healthier and tastier.*
The original mixture for the stuffing goes like:
Ground beef
Broccoli
Velveeta
Cream of mushroom soup
Cooked white rice
Okay. The first thing we're doing is scrapping the rice. We've already got bread, which is plenty of starch. I image the rice was meant to make this meal stretch farther to feed more people cheaply? We're just a little family, though. And we're watching our carbs.
Next, cream of mushroom soup? I'm fresh out. But I do have a can of mushroom pieces and some milk. And some shredded sharp cheddar cheese instead of Velveeta...because. Just because. You know why.
I ALWAYS keep ground beef and broccoli florets in my freezer. Always have. Always will.
So here's what! Brown the ground beef. I like to flavor mine up with salt, pepper, Tony's, garlic and onion. It never hurts. Drain it.
You steamed some broccoli while you were doing that? Good. Chop it up small, small and throw it in with the beef. Also add in some (drained) canned mushrooms. Stir, stir. Drain it one more time if your veggies cook out a lot.
At this point, I dumped the meat and veggies into a big bowl and put the pan back on the heat. I threw in a little bit of butter (about 1.5 tbs) and melted it, then added the same amount in flour (about 1.5 tbs) to make a quick roux base for the cheese sauce. Stir the roux around until it's pasty, then slowly add in some milk. I don't know, like...1/2 cup? 3/4 cup? I was not measuring at this point. I was ROLLING WITH IT.
Stir and cook it like that until it starts to steam and thicken, then add in some cheese. Again - and you know you love me - I have no idea how much cheese. Maybe 1 cup. Maybe more. Just stir and taste, stir and taste. Season it, if you like! Salt and pepper. I'm sooo tired aaaalll of the time.
Once you don't hate your cheese sauce, dump in the meat and stir everything around. It needs to not be too soupy. It needs to be thick and cheesy and kind of...gluey. Add more cheese until it does that.
NOW you can hollow out your rolls, stuff them to bejesus, and brush the tops of the rolls with a little melted butter. Pop them in the oven (preheated to 400) for about 15-20 minutes. They will be crusty and buttery on the outside, and warm and gooey on the inside. They will fill you up and keep you that way.
THE END
* Note: this is not a healthy recipe, exactly, but I count removing the Velveeta as making it more healthy, so...whatever. DON'T YOU JUDGE ME.
Banana Nut Bread
HA! I showed you, cookbook fiasco. Except I need four bananas. I guess I'll be making one loaf and keeping it to myself. I'm not even sure if this is mom's because I can't remember mom EVER having pumpkin pie spice, but it's the one I found in my handwriting, so I'm going with this one.
Banana Nut Bread
2 1/4 c. flour
1 1/2 c. sugar
1 1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
4 large bananas
1/2 c. butter
1/3 c. oil
5 tbsp. water
2 eggs
2 tsp. pumpkin pie spice
pecans
Mix all ingredients. Pour into two loaf pans. Bake at 325 for 55 - 65 minutes.
Banana Nut Bread
2 1/4 c. flour
1 1/2 c. sugar
1 1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
4 large bananas
1/2 c. butter
1/3 c. oil
5 tbsp. water
2 eggs
2 tsp. pumpkin pie spice
pecans
Mix all ingredients. Pour into two loaf pans. Bake at 325 for 55 - 65 minutes.
Cookbooks
How many do you think you have? I think I only have maybe 30 (counting my Harry Potter cookbook, too, dammit, even though I might never get around to whipping up black pudding, I am quite sure), but I have a giant basket full of loose leaf paper and magazine clippings and notebooks and post-it notes. I think I'm going to start trying to put them here. Like, I'm going to try to use this site for what it was intended.
This morning I have two mushy bananas that I don't want to throw out. I don't have the cream to make banana ice cream (which is a shame - it's so dreary and humid and hot outside, ice cream would perk up the Paddies for sure), but I do have all the fixings for banana nut bread.
Except...I can't find mom's recipe.
I can find Paula Deen's recipe. I can find Miss Mary Bobo's recipe. I bet I could find something JK Rowling would do with two mushy bananas, but all I want is Brenda Fern's banana bread.
I use this site at least once a week to cook. I pull up the recipe I want on my laptop, and get cooking. No leafing through pages and pages of scribbled notes like I used to, just a quick search and I've got what I need.
(note to self: find and add that really good buttercream recipe because if I have to spend one more Saturday googling buttercream...)
Anyway, so hopefully you'll see an onslaught of recipes show up. Some may be silly, but I have to write down everything because I have a terrible memory. I'll try to stick to ones I've tried for now.
And as soon as I've found that banana nut bread recipe, It's going up.
This morning I have two mushy bananas that I don't want to throw out. I don't have the cream to make banana ice cream (which is a shame - it's so dreary and humid and hot outside, ice cream would perk up the Paddies for sure), but I do have all the fixings for banana nut bread.
Except...I can't find mom's recipe.
I can find Paula Deen's recipe. I can find Miss Mary Bobo's recipe. I bet I could find something JK Rowling would do with two mushy bananas, but all I want is Brenda Fern's banana bread.
I use this site at least once a week to cook. I pull up the recipe I want on my laptop, and get cooking. No leafing through pages and pages of scribbled notes like I used to, just a quick search and I've got what I need.
(note to self: find and add that really good buttercream recipe because if I have to spend one more Saturday googling buttercream...)
Anyway, so hopefully you'll see an onslaught of recipes show up. Some may be silly, but I have to write down everything because I have a terrible memory. I'll try to stick to ones I've tried for now.
And as soon as I've found that banana nut bread recipe, It's going up.
Mom's Vegetable Soup
AHOY, SISTER-COUSIN!
So awhile back I was making all these promises about sending you the recipe for mom's vegetable soup! You know what I did instead? I sent it to a blog friend, but not you! I'm an awful, awful person! I guess because I wanted to write it to you separately, full of State quotes and inside jokes, but then I never got around to it.
(I cried when Marcel hung this piece. True story.)
I'm going to try to reword my notes into an actual recipe, so, hold on.
Vegetable (Beef) Soup*
(The beef can be left out, I guess. I leave it out of the title, so it sounds less like something they would serve you in the school cafeteria.)
1 lb. stew meat
1 onion, chopped
SOME BUTTER I GUESS
random amounts of water
1 14.5 oz can of diced tomatoes
2 sm. cans of tomato sauce (I have never seen a single person posses the big can of tomato sauce)
3 stalks celery, chopped
salt, pepper, Tony's to taste
2 - 3 potatoes, chopped
5 - 6 carrots, sliced (or frozen, my store doesn't have frozen sliced carrots, WTH)
Small frozen bags of corn, green beans, and butter beans
Melt the butter in a giant pot. Put the meat and onion all up in it, until the meat is just brown. Add water to cover meat and onions plus about 1" over. Add diced tomatoes, tomato sauce, celery, and seasonings.*
Bring to a boil (Call me old fashioned; but I think fire is magic, and it scares me a lot.), cover and simmer for 30 minutes.
Add potatoes, carrots and simmer for 30 more minutes. (I will often think of you when I'm in less than pants.)
Add frozen vegetables. (I wouldn't wipe my ass with Billy's The Four Food Groups!) This is probably where you would add the spaghetti noodles if you are living in the Lofton house circa 1989. Your call. Bring to a boil again and then simmer, covered, for 15 - 20 more minutes.
EAT WITH GRILLED CHEESE (or cheese on toast, slightly melted in the microwave, which is how Mom and I do it SHUT UP KENDRA IT TASTES GOOD AND IS EASY.)
As you know it makes a shit-ton. As you know, my husband is just like our dad (who, your father?), so I had to freeze a lot for special Krista-meals when he's gone. It's like a tiny healthy surprise in my freezer! Right next to last year's Cadbury eggs and mango popsicles (you should try those, mmm).
Oh, hey, can Curt eat soup without making an ass out of himself? When can kids do that? (CHRISTOPHER MARLOWE WROTE ALLLLL MY PLAYS)
I LOVE YOU.
*it says TO TASTE, but do you REALLY want to taste at this point?
(I don't care about America, all I care about is sex and booze and pills!)
So awhile back I was making all these promises about sending you the recipe for mom's vegetable soup! You know what I did instead? I sent it to a blog friend, but not you! I'm an awful, awful person! I guess because I wanted to write it to you separately, full of State quotes and inside jokes, but then I never got around to it.
(I cried when Marcel hung this piece. True story.)
I'm going to try to reword my notes into an actual recipe, so, hold on.
Vegetable (Beef) Soup*
(The beef can be left out, I guess. I leave it out of the title, so it sounds less like something they would serve you in the school cafeteria.)
1 lb. stew meat
1 onion, chopped
SOME BUTTER I GUESS
random amounts of water
1 14.5 oz can of diced tomatoes
2 sm. cans of tomato sauce (I have never seen a single person posses the big can of tomato sauce)
3 stalks celery, chopped
salt, pepper, Tony's to taste
2 - 3 potatoes, chopped
5 - 6 carrots, sliced (or frozen, my store doesn't have frozen sliced carrots, WTH)
Small frozen bags of corn, green beans, and butter beans
Melt the butter in a giant pot. Put the meat and onion all up in it, until the meat is just brown. Add water to cover meat and onions plus about 1" over. Add diced tomatoes, tomato sauce, celery, and seasonings.*
Bring to a boil (Call me old fashioned; but I think fire is magic, and it scares me a lot.), cover and simmer for 30 minutes.
Add potatoes, carrots and simmer for 30 more minutes. (I will often think of you when I'm in less than pants.)
Add frozen vegetables. (I wouldn't wipe my ass with Billy's The Four Food Groups!) This is probably where you would add the spaghetti noodles if you are living in the Lofton house circa 1989. Your call. Bring to a boil again and then simmer, covered, for 15 - 20 more minutes.
EAT WITH GRILLED CHEESE (or cheese on toast, slightly melted in the microwave, which is how Mom and I do it SHUT UP KENDRA IT TASTES GOOD AND IS EASY.)
As you know it makes a shit-ton. As you know, my husband is just like our dad (who, your father?), so I had to freeze a lot for special Krista-meals when he's gone. It's like a tiny healthy surprise in my freezer! Right next to last year's Cadbury eggs and mango popsicles (you should try those, mmm).
Oh, hey, can Curt eat soup without making an ass out of himself? When can kids do that? (CHRISTOPHER MARLOWE WROTE ALLLLL MY PLAYS)
I LOVE YOU.
*it says TO TASTE, but do you REALLY want to taste at this point?
(I don't care about America, all I care about is sex and booze and pills!)
Chicken Teriyaki Bowl
I LOVE THIS RECIPE.
CHICKEN TERIYAKI BOWL
Part ONE:
Preheat the oven to 350. GO!
* 1 lb. cubed boneless chicken
* 1 large onion
Cut the chicken up however you want. Salt and pepper it. Roughly chop the onion into chunks. Toss both things in a casserole dish.
Part TWO:
Get a mixing bowl.
* 8 tbs soy sauce
* 3/4 cup sugar
* 1/2 cup vinegar
Stir it all together! Set it aside!
Part THREE:
Steam some vegetables.
* Broccoli (or whatever)
* White pepper
* Ground ginger
I don't care what kind of vegetables. I prefer to use fresh broccoli, but I've also used green beans, mushrooms and various frozen mixes. Whatever sounds like it would go good with teriyaki chicken, you know?
Toss the veggies around with about 1/4 cup of the teriyaki sauce mixture (in the bowl, that you put over there on the counter), and a sprinkling of white pepper and ginger. To taste. Cover and steam in the microwave, or whatever. However you usually steam vegetables.
Pour the REST of the teriyaki sauce aaaallll over the chicken and onion in the casserole dish. Stick it in the oven for about an hour.
Part FOUR:
* Rice
Make rice. I like white rice with this dish, but brown rice probably is fine.
While the rice cooks, check on the chicken a few times while it bakes. Use a big spoon to baste the chicken with the juices as it cooks to make sure it is JUICY and AWESOME.
Part FIVE:
Rice goes in a bowl. Chicken and onion go in the bowl. Vegetables go in the bowl.
Food goes in your face. SO, SO GOOD.
Not super photogenic, but SO GOOD.
CHICKEN TERIYAKI BOWL
Part ONE:
Preheat the oven to 350. GO!
* 1 lb. cubed boneless chicken
* 1 large onion
Cut the chicken up however you want. Salt and pepper it. Roughly chop the onion into chunks. Toss both things in a casserole dish.
Part TWO:
Get a mixing bowl.
* 8 tbs soy sauce
* 3/4 cup sugar
* 1/2 cup vinegar
Stir it all together! Set it aside!
Part THREE:
Steam some vegetables.
* Broccoli (or whatever)
* White pepper
* Ground ginger
I don't care what kind of vegetables. I prefer to use fresh broccoli, but I've also used green beans, mushrooms and various frozen mixes. Whatever sounds like it would go good with teriyaki chicken, you know?
Toss the veggies around with about 1/4 cup of the teriyaki sauce mixture (in the bowl, that you put over there on the counter), and a sprinkling of white pepper and ginger. To taste. Cover and steam in the microwave, or whatever. However you usually steam vegetables.
Pour the REST of the teriyaki sauce aaaallll over the chicken and onion in the casserole dish. Stick it in the oven for about an hour.
Part FOUR:
* Rice
Make rice. I like white rice with this dish, but brown rice probably is fine.
While the rice cooks, check on the chicken a few times while it bakes. Use a big spoon to baste the chicken with the juices as it cooks to make sure it is JUICY and AWESOME.
Part FIVE:
Rice goes in a bowl. Chicken and onion go in the bowl. Vegetables go in the bowl.
Food goes in your face. SO, SO GOOD.
Not super photogenic, but SO GOOD.
Christmas Traditions
Hey, we haven't updated since, uh...September!
Krista has a great excu-SHE'S PREGNANT, Y'ALL. I'm gonna be an aunt! EEEE.
In the meantime, let's talk Christmas. After three years of momming it up my ownself, I have nailed down a pretty solid set of Christmas traditions for my little family. After Santa comes to our house, we spend one whole day together, just the three of us, before we pack up and head out to spend time with the extended family.
My Christmas spread is simple - there's no point in making a big meal when we're just going to leave the next day. I have already blogged most of the recipes:
Natchitoches Meat Pies - I start my holiday season off (usually a week or two beforehand, since it's an all-day process) by making up a double batch of these, and freezing them. On Christmas day, I take out as many as we'll eat, and fry them up for lunch/dinner. The rest, I pack up and give to family and friends (and keep some extra on hand in my freezer, BECAUSE THEY ARE DELICIOUS).
Christmas Eve is spent making an insane amount of Nestle Toll House Cookies. The recipe is on the bag of Nestle chocolate chips, and everyone in the world loves these cookies. I bring some to the neighbors. I pack some up as gifts for friends. I eat about 50 of them myself. Santa Claus gets a heaping plate of them. I use real butter, and pecans from my grandparents' farm, and I like to think that makes them taste extra nice.
My oven works overtime Christmas Eve, because I also make batches and batches of Sausage Balls. For snacking, for gifting, and just because. They also make great breakfast munchies for Christmas morning!
Speaking of breakfast, I like to start Christmas morning off with a Breakfast Quiche. It's easy to make and tastes good all day long. It does not last all day long, however.
When it's time for lunch/dinner (I cook Christmas lunch around 1:00 pm and everyone eats whenever they want, as often as they want, as late into the evening as they can stand), I fry up some meat pies, and serve it alongside Potatoes and Green Beans. Which I only make once a year because of how terrible this is for people to consume. And because it goes really, really well with meat pies.
This year, I'm planning to introduce a new tradition to the mix. The last time I talked to my sister on the phone, we discussed this. I thought I might have been the only one who remembered this, but I was so happy that she does too!
One year, when we were little kids, my family discovered Dairy Queen's newest product: the Blizzard. (Internet research tells me this was probably 1986. I was 8 years old. Krista was 5.) My parents, being awesome, figured they could make Oreo Blizzards at home and save us both a trip into town (COUNTRY LIVING, Y'ALL) and some cash. The result was my whole family sitting around the Christmas tree, lapping up homemade Oreo Blizzards and feeling sugary joy together. I remember this so vividly, and so fondly, that I'm going to treat myself this year and possibly every year from now until I die of diabetes-related illness.
It's such an easy recipe, I'll just link you to it - Oreo Blizzards
And that's it. Have a great holiday season, whoever you are, reading this, and I love you! Krista probably loves you, too! I'm sure we'll post more in 2012 (we might even post more in 2011 if we feel like it), because neither of us can go very long without cooking. Or talking. Mostly talking.
Best buttery wishes,
Kendra
Krista has a great excu-SHE'S PREGNANT, Y'ALL. I'm gonna be an aunt! EEEE.
In the meantime, let's talk Christmas. After three years of momming it up my ownself, I have nailed down a pretty solid set of Christmas traditions for my little family. After Santa comes to our house, we spend one whole day together, just the three of us, before we pack up and head out to spend time with the extended family.
My Christmas spread is simple - there's no point in making a big meal when we're just going to leave the next day. I have already blogged most of the recipes:
Natchitoches Meat Pies - I start my holiday season off (usually a week or two beforehand, since it's an all-day process) by making up a double batch of these, and freezing them. On Christmas day, I take out as many as we'll eat, and fry them up for lunch/dinner. The rest, I pack up and give to family and friends (and keep some extra on hand in my freezer, BECAUSE THEY ARE DELICIOUS).
Christmas Eve is spent making an insane amount of Nestle Toll House Cookies. The recipe is on the bag of Nestle chocolate chips, and everyone in the world loves these cookies. I bring some to the neighbors. I pack some up as gifts for friends. I eat about 50 of them myself. Santa Claus gets a heaping plate of them. I use real butter, and pecans from my grandparents' farm, and I like to think that makes them taste extra nice.
My oven works overtime Christmas Eve, because I also make batches and batches of Sausage Balls. For snacking, for gifting, and just because. They also make great breakfast munchies for Christmas morning!
Speaking of breakfast, I like to start Christmas morning off with a Breakfast Quiche. It's easy to make and tastes good all day long. It does not last all day long, however.
When it's time for lunch/dinner (I cook Christmas lunch around 1:00 pm and everyone eats whenever they want, as often as they want, as late into the evening as they can stand), I fry up some meat pies, and serve it alongside Potatoes and Green Beans. Which I only make once a year because of how terrible this is for people to consume. And because it goes really, really well with meat pies.
This year, I'm planning to introduce a new tradition to the mix. The last time I talked to my sister on the phone, we discussed this. I thought I might have been the only one who remembered this, but I was so happy that she does too!
One year, when we were little kids, my family discovered Dairy Queen's newest product: the Blizzard. (Internet research tells me this was probably 1986. I was 8 years old. Krista was 5.) My parents, being awesome, figured they could make Oreo Blizzards at home and save us both a trip into town (COUNTRY LIVING, Y'ALL) and some cash. The result was my whole family sitting around the Christmas tree, lapping up homemade Oreo Blizzards and feeling sugary joy together. I remember this so vividly, and so fondly, that I'm going to treat myself this year and possibly every year from now until I die of diabetes-related illness.
It's such an easy recipe, I'll just link you to it - Oreo Blizzards
And that's it. Have a great holiday season, whoever you are, reading this, and I love you! Krista probably loves you, too! I'm sure we'll post more in 2012 (we might even post more in 2011 if we feel like it), because neither of us can go very long without cooking. Or talking. Mostly talking.
Best buttery wishes,
Kendra
Salmon Croquettes
Hey, we haven't updated since July!
I, personally, have a good reason - I haven't been cooking. I'll make BLTs and tacos every week, pop a frozen pizza in the oven, or we'll drive down the road to Sonic. This has been going on all summer. Last week I sat down to balance our account and noticed it was a little airer than usual. The only thing that had changed was me not cooking so I put on my big girl panties and tallied up all our meals outside of the house for the entire month of August - $350. I asked a lot of people what was the norm for them and got answers ranging from like $50 to $500, but aside from maybe two people, everyone always added how HORRIBLE it was and how GUILTY they felt.
So why shouldn't I change it?
Right now I'm creating a list of monthly roating meals - BLTs and tacos are staying because we love them. I'm adding pork chops and beef tips and at least one occurence of mashed potatoes because Will loves that stuff. I get shrimp and grits and homemade pizza. I'm also leaving plenty of room to play - there's a ton of recipes I've wanted to try for ages and just haven't done it.
For instance, I had four cans of salmon I bought some time last year to make these croquettes. I bet you don't like canned salmon, but here we go!
Salmon Croquettes
(or: salmon patties)
(or, even better: salmon paddies)
4 small cans of salmon, flaked, drained
1 egg, beaten
1/2 cup bread crumbs (I used plain), plus some more which I didn't measure
2 tbsp green onion
oil for frying
Heat your oil on medium. MIX ALL THE INGREDIENTS UP. Sprinkle some more bread crumbs all over your patties. FRY 'EM, two minutesish on each side. Eat them.
I wonder if you would like these? Will did, but I remember he had a great-aunt who made salmon burgers he still won't shut up about. Also, I served them with mashed potatoes, so there's that.
Anyway, I'm just glad I'm blogging here again!
I, personally, have a good reason - I haven't been cooking. I'll make BLTs and tacos every week, pop a frozen pizza in the oven, or we'll drive down the road to Sonic. This has been going on all summer. Last week I sat down to balance our account and noticed it was a little airer than usual. The only thing that had changed was me not cooking so I put on my big girl panties and tallied up all our meals outside of the house for the entire month of August - $350. I asked a lot of people what was the norm for them and got answers ranging from like $50 to $500, but aside from maybe two people, everyone always added how HORRIBLE it was and how GUILTY they felt.
So why shouldn't I change it?
Right now I'm creating a list of monthly roating meals - BLTs and tacos are staying because we love them. I'm adding pork chops and beef tips and at least one occurence of mashed potatoes because Will loves that stuff. I get shrimp and grits and homemade pizza. I'm also leaving plenty of room to play - there's a ton of recipes I've wanted to try for ages and just haven't done it.
For instance, I had four cans of salmon I bought some time last year to make these croquettes. I bet you don't like canned salmon, but here we go!
Salmon Croquettes
(or: salmon patties)
(or, even better: salmon paddies)
4 small cans of salmon, flaked, drained
1 egg, beaten
1/2 cup bread crumbs (I used plain), plus some more which I didn't measure
2 tbsp green onion
oil for frying
Heat your oil on medium. MIX ALL THE INGREDIENTS UP. Sprinkle some more bread crumbs all over your patties. FRY 'EM, two minutesish on each side. Eat them.
I wonder if you would like these? Will did, but I remember he had a great-aunt who made salmon burgers he still won't shut up about. Also, I served them with mashed potatoes, so there's that.
Anyway, I'm just glad I'm blogging here again!
Lemon Cake
OR: "That Cake I Called You On The Actual Telephone About"
Against the advice of my muffiny mid-section, I have been making cakes lately. I'm not a great baker, since I know very little about the science of how flour and shit works, but I can follow a recipe pretty good!
Also, I LOVE lemon cake. Don't get me started. HOWEVER. As we discussed on the phone, box mixes labeled 'Lemon Cake' don't taste a whole lot like lemons. They taste like the vague concept of lemon flavor as imagined by someone who was raised on the international space station.
ALSO-also, yeah I could make a fresh lemon cake from scratch, but I'd rather Sandra Lee it up and just pimp out a damn box mix. I have, like, five minutes after work to make food happen.
Which brings me to this recipe. I do not remember where I even got it. Well...yes I do, I got it from an internet forum about a year ago, but I can't find that particular post (or the poster who made it) now, so let's just say "I stole this recipe" and call it done.
___________________________________________________________
MUCH BETTER BOXED LEMON CAKE
• 1 box lemon cake mix
• 1 small box instant lemon pudding
• 4 large eggs
• 1 cup sour cream
• ½ cup vegetable oil
• Juice of 1 lemon
• Zest of 1 lemon
For the glaze:
• 2 cups powdered sugar
• Zest of 1 lemon
• Fresh lemon juice
Basically, you will be taking a box mix, and lemoning the hell out of it. Just throw in anything that might be even remotely related to lemons. SOUR cream. Haha. Get it?
Preheat the oven as directed on the cake mix box. (I went with 325 for my pan.) The recipe suggests I carefully add the ingredients one at a time, beating them all together on medium speed for 2 minutes.
So I dumped everything in a bowl and stirred it around by hand. It was very, very thick. Like, so thick that I called you to ask if this was normal for cake batter. Should it be the consistency of peanut butter? I don't really understand what's going on.
Our brainstorming session led me to pour in about 1/3 - 1/2 cup milk to be safe. Good enough!
Grease a Bundt pan (I usually go for shortening-and-flour, but you can spray it with Pam or use real butter or whatever. You know these things), and pour in the batter. Bake for the time specified on the cake mix box (45 minutes-ish). Remove from oven when done, and allow it to cool.
That thick, scary batter rose and fluffed up like a dream. It was a little bit crumbly, which may have been the milk I added? But it was not as dense or heavy as I had feared! It was great. And EXTREMELY lemon flavored. Everything I hated about box mixed lemon cake - REPAIRED.
Now some thoughts on the glaze...
To make the glaze, mix powdered sugar and lemon zest in a small bowl. Add lemon juice, one teaspoon at a time, stirring well after each addition, until it is the consistency of a thick cake batter. (Well, you would know about thick, recipe.)
Drizzle the glaze over the top of the cooled cake, allowing it to run down the sides.
My glaze was thinner than described, because I used all the juice I had (one whole lemon). Waste not.
AND OH MY GOD. That glaze was like lemon crack. It was just...pure lemon. I'm still not sure that's the way to go with this cake, because...yes, I wanted MORE LEMON FLAVOR. But holy crap. Seriously. So possibly a more complimentary glaze, and not more of the same flavor, is the way to go. Maybe just a plain sugar glaze, or like you suggested - a cream cheese-based icing.
That's how I felt last night eating a warmish piece of this cake. This morning (yes, for breakfast), I think I changed my mind. The glaze and cake had time to meld together overnight, into a...a...a sort of...it was...kind of like...
Dammit. There are only two words that work here, and I hate them both. But those two words are:
Luscious
Moist
And I apologize for that.
Against the advice of my muffiny mid-section, I have been making cakes lately. I'm not a great baker, since I know very little about the science of how flour and shit works, but I can follow a recipe pretty good!
Also, I LOVE lemon cake. Don't get me started. HOWEVER. As we discussed on the phone, box mixes labeled 'Lemon Cake' don't taste a whole lot like lemons. They taste like the vague concept of lemon flavor as imagined by someone who was raised on the international space station.
ALSO-also, yeah I could make a fresh lemon cake from scratch, but I'd rather Sandra Lee it up and just pimp out a damn box mix. I have, like, five minutes after work to make food happen.
Which brings me to this recipe. I do not remember where I even got it. Well...yes I do, I got it from an internet forum about a year ago, but I can't find that particular post (or the poster who made it) now, so let's just say "I stole this recipe" and call it done.
___________________________________________________________
MUCH BETTER BOXED LEMON CAKE
• 1 box lemon cake mix
• 1 small box instant lemon pudding
• 4 large eggs
• 1 cup sour cream
• ½ cup vegetable oil
• Juice of 1 lemon
• Zest of 1 lemon
For the glaze:
• 2 cups powdered sugar
• Zest of 1 lemon
• Fresh lemon juice
Basically, you will be taking a box mix, and lemoning the hell out of it. Just throw in anything that might be even remotely related to lemons. SOUR cream. Haha. Get it?
Preheat the oven as directed on the cake mix box. (I went with 325 for my pan.) The recipe suggests I carefully add the ingredients one at a time, beating them all together on medium speed for 2 minutes.
So I dumped everything in a bowl and stirred it around by hand. It was very, very thick. Like, so thick that I called you to ask if this was normal for cake batter. Should it be the consistency of peanut butter? I don't really understand what's going on.
Our brainstorming session led me to pour in about 1/3 - 1/2 cup milk to be safe. Good enough!
Grease a Bundt pan (I usually go for shortening-and-flour, but you can spray it with Pam or use real butter or whatever. You know these things), and pour in the batter. Bake for the time specified on the cake mix box (45 minutes-ish). Remove from oven when done, and allow it to cool.
That thick, scary batter rose and fluffed up like a dream. It was a little bit crumbly, which may have been the milk I added? But it was not as dense or heavy as I had feared! It was great. And EXTREMELY lemon flavored. Everything I hated about box mixed lemon cake - REPAIRED.
Now some thoughts on the glaze...
To make the glaze, mix powdered sugar and lemon zest in a small bowl. Add lemon juice, one teaspoon at a time, stirring well after each addition, until it is the consistency of a thick cake batter. (Well, you would know about thick, recipe.)
Drizzle the glaze over the top of the cooled cake, allowing it to run down the sides.
My glaze was thinner than described, because I used all the juice I had (one whole lemon). Waste not.
AND OH MY GOD. That glaze was like lemon crack. It was just...pure lemon. I'm still not sure that's the way to go with this cake, because...yes, I wanted MORE LEMON FLAVOR. But holy crap. Seriously. So possibly a more complimentary glaze, and not more of the same flavor, is the way to go. Maybe just a plain sugar glaze, or like you suggested - a cream cheese-based icing.
That's how I felt last night eating a warmish piece of this cake. This morning (yes, for breakfast), I think I changed my mind. The glaze and cake had time to meld together overnight, into a...a...a sort of...it was...kind of like...
Dammit. There are only two words that work here, and I hate them both. But those two words are:
Luscious
Moist
And I apologize for that.
Chili
I don't know why I chose yesterday - a beautiful 94 degree early summer day in Louisiana - to make a pot of chili. But it was probably the best chili I've ever made, so take that, conventional sense!
The base recipe I use is Mom's. I'm sure you have it somewhere. But I always do my own thing with the seasoning, the way I usually do - I cook it down, then taste it, taste it, taste it. I add a little more of this, a little more of that, until it's exactly where I want it. This is a crucial step in cooking for me - I never, never follow the seasoning instructions of any recipe exactly as written. Please keep that in mind, because you can't really write down a recipe for chili seasoning. No you cannot.
Here's the best I can do!
______________________________________
Chili
• 2 lbs lean ground beef
• 1 tbs flour
• 3-4 minced garlic cloves
• 2 medium onions, chopped
• 1 chopped green pepper
* 1 chopped jalepeno pepper (scrape out the seeds for milder chili, leave some in for hot)
• 1 can (8 oz) tomato sauce
* 1 can light or dark (doesn't matter) red kidney beans (drained and rinsed)
• 2 cups water (plus more, as needed)
SEASONING - a rough guideline on where to start. Work your way from there.
• 2 tsp salt
* 1 tsp black pepper
• 3 tsp chili powder
• 1 tsp whole cumin seed
• 3 dashes Tabasco sauce
* A couple generous shakes of Tony's
I ended up adding MORE of all of that, a little bit at a time.
In a big stew pot, brown the ground beef. As it cooks down, add the flour. When it's well browned, drain the meat well and add all of the other ingredients EXCEPT THE BEANS. The water level should be just enough to cover everything comfortably.
Simmer the pot (either covered or uncovered, I don't think it matters) over medium-low heat for 2 ½ hours, while you sip some iced tea with your feet in a kiddie pool on the patio. Go inside frequently to get another popsicle, and stir the chili. Add more water if it cooks down too much. Turn the heat down if it starts to boil - you just need it to simmer happily along all afternoon.
After 2 ½ hours, add in the beans. This is when you can taste and adjust the flavor to get it just perfect. This is also a good time to make cornbread muffins.
Keep the pot simmering until everyone is ready to come inside and eat. I like to eat mine with a little sprinkle of cheddar cheese on top, and a Dust Buster in one hand to catch the cornbread crumbs your nephew spreads all over the house.
The base recipe I use is Mom's. I'm sure you have it somewhere. But I always do my own thing with the seasoning, the way I usually do - I cook it down, then taste it, taste it, taste it. I add a little more of this, a little more of that, until it's exactly where I want it. This is a crucial step in cooking for me - I never, never follow the seasoning instructions of any recipe exactly as written. Please keep that in mind, because you can't really write down a recipe for chili seasoning. No you cannot.
Here's the best I can do!
______________________________________
Chili
• 2 lbs lean ground beef
• 1 tbs flour
• 3-4 minced garlic cloves
• 2 medium onions, chopped
• 1 chopped green pepper
* 1 chopped jalepeno pepper (scrape out the seeds for milder chili, leave some in for hot)
• 1 can (8 oz) tomato sauce
* 1 can light or dark (doesn't matter) red kidney beans (drained and rinsed)
• 2 cups water (plus more, as needed)
SEASONING - a rough guideline on where to start. Work your way from there.
• 2 tsp salt
* 1 tsp black pepper
• 3 tsp chili powder
• 1 tsp whole cumin seed
• 3 dashes Tabasco sauce
* A couple generous shakes of Tony's
I ended up adding MORE of all of that, a little bit at a time.
In a big stew pot, brown the ground beef. As it cooks down, add the flour. When it's well browned, drain the meat well and add all of the other ingredients EXCEPT THE BEANS. The water level should be just enough to cover everything comfortably.
Simmer the pot (either covered or uncovered, I don't think it matters) over medium-low heat for 2 ½ hours, while you sip some iced tea with your feet in a kiddie pool on the patio. Go inside frequently to get another popsicle, and stir the chili. Add more water if it cooks down too much. Turn the heat down if it starts to boil - you just need it to simmer happily along all afternoon.
After 2 ½ hours, add in the beans. This is when you can taste and adjust the flavor to get it just perfect. This is also a good time to make cornbread muffins.
Keep the pot simmering until everyone is ready to come inside and eat. I like to eat mine with a little sprinkle of cheddar cheese on top, and a Dust Buster in one hand to catch the cornbread crumbs your nephew spreads all over the house.
Impossibly Easy Cheeseburger Pie
You know this recipe. Even if you've never made it, even if you've never tasted it, you know this recipe because it's been on the back of the Bisquick box since before you were born.
So I'm in my empty house yesterday, staring into my empty pantry, determined not to go grocery shopping. What can I make with what little I have? Spaghetti? No, I don't have tomato sauce. Sandwiches? No, I don't have bread. Chicken? No, I don't have...chicken.
I do have a lump of hamburger at the bottom of the freezer, a couple of almost-expired eggs, a box of Bisquick left over from Christmas and that laaast little bit of milk that sits in the jug because it's not quite enough for a bowl of cereal.
Inspiring, no? Let's look at this recipe in the harsh light of day:
___________________________________________
Impossibly Easy Cheeseburger Pie
• 1 lb lean ground beef
• 1 large onion, chopped (1 cup)
• ½ tsp salt
• 1 cup shredded cheddar
• ½ cup Bisquick mix
• 1 cup milk
• 2 eggs
Oven temp: 400
Spray baking dish with cooking spray. Cook beef and onion in a skillet until beef is brown. Drain, and stir in salt. Spread in baking dish, and sprinkle with cheese.
In a small bowl, whisk remaining ingredients until blended. Pour into dish, over the meat. Bake about 25 minutes, or until center is done (test with a knife or toothpick).
___________________________________________
Yes, the only seasoning you'll need here is 1/2 tsp of salt and an onion. Of course.
When you're done laughing (I'll wait......), please, get the garlic, black pepper, Tony's and Worcestershire sauce out, because damn, y'all. This ain't the Depression Era Midwest.
I did my best to spice up the meat. If I'd had any mushrooms or crumbled bacon, I would have added that. Hell, you can probably add anything you want to this dish, because let's face it - this is a Bottom Of The Barrel Casserole. This is what you make when there is nothing else to make, and no one to impress.
I raised an eyebrow as I poured the Bisquick mixture over the cheese. It was runny, and you could still see egg yolk floating around on top. The batter didn't sit on top of the casserole - it ran down into it. I was skeptical, but intrigued, as it baked.
How to describe the finished product? Well, not "pie," for damn sure. It was more like...a meat sponge. Sort of a fluffy hamburger quiche, but more squishy and airy. Ignore the picture on the box - you can't cut into this, you can only glop it out with a spoon. Cow cobbler.
It tasted okay. It was still a little bland, but you just knew it would be. It was hot, filling, quick and easy, though. And I didn't have to put on shoes and wade through the Super Walmart on a weekend to make it. Because it satisfied all of my low standard requirements for success, I declare it one!
Shayne enjoyed it. You know Will would love it, too.
So I'm in my empty house yesterday, staring into my empty pantry, determined not to go grocery shopping. What can I make with what little I have? Spaghetti? No, I don't have tomato sauce. Sandwiches? No, I don't have bread. Chicken? No, I don't have...chicken.
I do have a lump of hamburger at the bottom of the freezer, a couple of almost-expired eggs, a box of Bisquick left over from Christmas and that laaast little bit of milk that sits in the jug because it's not quite enough for a bowl of cereal.
Inspiring, no? Let's look at this recipe in the harsh light of day:
___________________________________________
Impossibly Easy Cheeseburger Pie
• 1 lb lean ground beef
• 1 large onion, chopped (1 cup)
• ½ tsp salt
• 1 cup shredded cheddar
• ½ cup Bisquick mix
• 1 cup milk
• 2 eggs
Oven temp: 400
Spray baking dish with cooking spray. Cook beef and onion in a skillet until beef is brown. Drain, and stir in salt. Spread in baking dish, and sprinkle with cheese.
In a small bowl, whisk remaining ingredients until blended. Pour into dish, over the meat. Bake about 25 minutes, or until center is done (test with a knife or toothpick).
___________________________________________
Yes, the only seasoning you'll need here is 1/2 tsp of salt and an onion. Of course.
When you're done laughing (I'll wait......), please, get the garlic, black pepper, Tony's and Worcestershire sauce out, because damn, y'all. This ain't the Depression Era Midwest.
I did my best to spice up the meat. If I'd had any mushrooms or crumbled bacon, I would have added that. Hell, you can probably add anything you want to this dish, because let's face it - this is a Bottom Of The Barrel Casserole. This is what you make when there is nothing else to make, and no one to impress.
I raised an eyebrow as I poured the Bisquick mixture over the cheese. It was runny, and you could still see egg yolk floating around on top. The batter didn't sit on top of the casserole - it ran down into it. I was skeptical, but intrigued, as it baked.
How to describe the finished product? Well, not "pie," for damn sure. It was more like...a meat sponge. Sort of a fluffy hamburger quiche, but more squishy and airy. Ignore the picture on the box - you can't cut into this, you can only glop it out with a spoon. Cow cobbler.
It tasted okay. It was still a little bland, but you just knew it would be. It was hot, filling, quick and easy, though. And I didn't have to put on shoes and wade through the Super Walmart on a weekend to make it. Because it satisfied all of my low standard requirements for success, I declare it one!
Shayne enjoyed it. You know Will would love it, too.
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